Monday, February 13, 2012

Birds do it, bees do it, even holding midfielders do it

Add a bit o' his bio, brown M&Ms, & borrowed adolescence.

Not the worst I ever wrote, but the most should-stay-wrapped. Anyway, to red-blooded American males with sometimes-better-halves, nothing captures l'ésprit de Valentine's Day quite like sitting alone on the floor in lieu of the couch 'cause the skull's eye(s) is shot as bad as the mind's, jumping up from time to time & shouting middle fingers at Més que un fuckoff, thumbs up at CyprioticA pretend that looks like the vintage Metallica logo, then do a shot of rotgut then breathe fire then scream the lyrics to Disposable Heroes.

Special Jose headbutts Piston Honda. What a pito.

The Fearless Prediction Killers, based on zero some kind-of research I guess not that much, check back in a month to see how wrong I was: Fucking Barcelona in a romp, ditto Fucking Madrid, Cavani chomps Chelsea, Arsène leads to exploding gasbags & Berlusconi but I repeat myself, Zenit or unhappy Pooty Poot no thanks, FC Hollywood, Fucking Inter & Give 'Em Hell APOEL. La France, je suis désolé.


Prunella Vulgaris said...

I hope that pizza rolls figure into this equation as well. Have a swanky day off!

Jim H. said...

♬The Champions♫

S.W. Anderson said...

What a coincidence! Cavani chomps Chelsea and je suis désolé were both on the menu of a cafe we visited not long ago. We opted for the petits pains glacés et Starbucks meilleur.

susan said...

How about giving her a nice bunch of flowers first so she isn't tempted to put hot sauce on your popcorn.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Have a big glass of whiskey, R.G.

It will fix everything.

Beach Bum said...

Valentine's Day is just another corporate scam, but I do accept invitations to any nearby buga-buga parties this time of year.

Life As I Know It Now said...

I like chocolates best and then some really good wine would be next. Write her a poem while you are at it but be sure to be sincere. Good luck and good night!

Randal Graves said...

duchess, oh crap, I forgot to buy some. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, etc.

jim, that was uncalled for. What did I ever do to you? Anyone have a Heineken?

SWA, just you wait until Famous Ray's starts franchising.

susan, I see the mind control ray has gotten to you, too.

if, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

BB, word, but buga-buga? You just made Silvio cry.

life, such materialism plays right into the hands of our MIC overlords. The return of the completely non-corporate CL is Sepp's valentine to all of us. Anyone else want a Heineken?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I'd rather have a nice Saint Pauli Girl, if that's ok R.G.

Anonymous said...

I've always thought the Amer vs Euro nomenclature battle was all about domestic violence.

Soccer v Football

Mr gives Mrs one in the kisser

Mrs give Mr a foot in the nuts

Someone call the cops before it devolves further! And everyone sit down, break open the heart-shaped box of chocolates, and share!

Demeur said...

If you speak of "Balls de la Foote" then you have me at a disadvantage. I only on occasion watch the oblong variety.

I went to a riot and football match broke out. Okay okay I was lazy too it was hockey.

Tom Harper said...

Beautiful music selection. Glad to see I'm not the only person who likes heavy metal AND Bartok.

Tengrain said...

Graves, you swine!

Once again I have to remind you--oh swanky one--to take off your socks when you kick off your shoes. Women find men unbelievably comical with socks on and the ol' knob in plain sight.

You can thank me later.



Randal Graves said...

if, you punk.

karl of the österreich, sir, there's a reason cups were invented.

demeur, insert jokes aboot aboot, Tim Horton's, and Pierre Trudeau here.

tom, Bartok fucks shit up.

tengrain, your concern with ma vie d'in flagrante delicto is disturbing like Famous Ray's blue plate special.