Saturday, December 10, 2011

Unfettered capitalist hedonism, or, wherein I refuse to use consumption because that should be reserved for an illness associated with the poor, the destitute, and the siblings of famous composers

50% off -- oh, just clothing. I'll take my drinking problem elsewhere.

March of the penguin.

Your weekly HOB update, six weeks late.

Animal farm.

These aren't a few of my favorite things.

Not even Chunk would take candy from this stranger.

The reason for the season.

What a coincidence, I too feel sparkly.

The preferred tool of black magicians everywhere.

I'd like to state, for the record, that the Duchess's penchant for grade school humor, not mine, was the impetus for this selection. I remain classy as ever.

Expiration dates? Where we're going we don't need expiration dates.

Fuck golf.

Colossal Dick aviators not included.



March of the penguins.

How does one test for this? See if he or she shits on a hippie?

Chinese Sharpei.

They don't sell PBR at the stadium. Sorry.

Train kept a-rollin'.

Do not pass go, do not collect more than $200 from the slush fund.

A Clevelandia snowman is sadder than your typical snowman.

Future Space Casino or strip joint? You decide.

Nourishment starts with tender human resources.

The Neighbor of the Beast.

Clevelandia in a capsule.


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Take off half your clothes in this weather?!?!

P.S. So festive, R.G. Are you coming down with something?

Beach Bum said...

Wanted to avoid after Thanksgiving shopping but we had to buy a refrigerator. Old one was starting to crap out and I've got to have ice cold milk with my Chips Ahoy cookies.

Damn thing has this fancy touch screen control pad on the outside of one of the doors. Its so smart, or I am so dumb, it has game show-like sound effects when you try and change the controls in a way it does not like.

When it starts talking I heading for the hills, or having it run for Congress.

zencomix said...

"50% off -- oh, just clothing. I'll take my drinking problem elsewhere."

You better take your whiskey home!

Randal Graves said...

if, I'm always fucking festive, who told you I'm not?

BB, just wait until the fridge is merely one link in the chain of surveillance.

zen, that's such a bloody good record. I live with 'em!

Demeur said...

Oh Randal you've given us too much to choose from for snarky comebacks.

Don't you know that we can't handle more than two or three choices? It's the American way now.

Laura said...

Your title was so long that I thought *it* was your blog post!


okjimm said...

nope nope nope..... doan need no Black Fridays.... see, A Plaid Thursday fits my wardrobe better.

susan said...

Wow. Now I've had my entire year's supply of virtual kristmaz kitsch and I didn't even have to go to the mall. Yes, they have them here too but carefully sequestered from the kwaint kitsch saved for the tourists.

Tom Harper said...

"I refuse to use consumption because that should be reserved for an illness associated with the poor, the destitute..."

Ah, but mere consumption is not the same thing as ostentatious consumption. And ostentatious consumption is what makes America the great nation she is today.

thatgirl said...

You have peace and love for the squirrels, O Gentil Hippy!

Randal Graves said...

demeur, but I gave you unpretty pictures instead of words on a variety of topics I care little about! No more Coke or Pepsi for you.

laura, that's ridiculous, each photograph is a carefully selected clue that will lead the reader to DB Cooper's buried treasure.

okjimm, saving the elbow-patched tweed for Tuesdays?

susan, the Duchess had it on good authority that this fine establishment was hawking select tomes on the greats of communism past (Stalin, Lenin, etc), yet, alack, they hath been all sold, and I wanted to share the beauty of socialist realism with you amoral capitalists.

tom, if only we didn't have that pesky gassy feeling.

thatgirl, don't make me go troo kvlt on you. Do people still use the peace sign? Why? What do you see in these pictures?

MRMacrum said...

Well, if we're gonna spend our way to the Rapture, we might as well do it at half price.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

All we are saying, R.G.

Laura said...

Not sure if anyone else mentioned it or not but, I did get a chuckle over the "Nipple Brush". :)
Well done Duchess! :)

Jim H. said...

Wait, wait, don't tell me. I think I cracked the code here. Okay, "consumption" is italicized in the title, right? That's the first clue. Consumption, as we all know, is another name for tuberculosis, commonly known as TB.

Then, after the big flare up in the previous episode of 'darkthroning' over a mighty Aerosmith allusion, and Jeff Beck discussion, we have our second clue: 'Train Kept a Rollin'" also an amazing A'smith song which, of course, is a cover of The Yardbirds version of the song which itself is a cover of the first 'rock and roll' version of the song by Johnny Burnette which, as almost no one knows, is a cover of the so-called jump blues classic by none other than Tiny Bradshaw, i.e. TB.


Except for the Duchess, I think I'd be winning the Internets.

anne said...

again ..i do like this duchess person ..with her fence leans and now the nipple brush . .. , / and of your last post was it .. i'm in the perspective .. .of 'ism,seasonal, of looking too closely at the wither on the walls .. .

S.W. Anderson said...

So, it's necessary to brush after every . . . Oh, never mind.

Randal Graves said...

mrmacrum, plus that police soft bullet gun might come in handy when they're trying to pilfer one's YoDutch.

if, once again, creamed corn gets the shaft.

laura, one more reason why Canadastan needs to be invaded.

jim, WRONG WRONG WRONG except for 12.3% of it. No year's supply of Turtle Wax, but one can should suffice.

anne, she is the bestest with the mostest, it's even in her library title, officially.

Badoomboom. SWA will be here all week.

Laura said...

Why does Anne get a sweet reply from you for saying pretty much the same thing as I did? I receive a "We're invading!!"

Fuck you!


Dr. Zaius said...

You would end your photographic montage with a reference to Jonathan Swift. ;o)