Saturday, March 21, 2009

Go away kid, ya bother me

Actually, stop on by for a celebratory drink -- how 'bout those fucking Vikings! -- as I didn't get around to posting the following because 1)I forgot, 2)the fucking Yahoo Draft Window was sucking all the electrons from the internets thus my computer was going slow enough as it was and 3)I forgot.

But as you all know, I'm a pig, so here are some scantily clad ladies for either your ogling enjoyment or righteous indignation:

It's fantasy baseball time.

No, not that kind. Unfortunately.

Quiet, Dusty, it's my blog. There will be no hunkery here.

Taking a cursory glance at the rosters, I cannot say who'll emerge the Victorious Champion of the Known Universe and Master of Grass (Wavy Gravy?), but my money is on Mathman because, despite my pleas to the contrary, I'm quite sure that he'll use his vast arithmetical wizardry to cheat us mere mortals. 2+2=5.


Non Je Ne Regrette Rien said...

down with no hunkery. pray tell, who has the cutest uniforms this year?

Tom Harper said...

I'm not a sports fan but I'll still be stopping by for that celebratory drink. I'll drink to that.

Übermilf said...

You do realize these are merely large corporations using you to obtain advertising dollars and any money you happen to have on you when you enter one of their wallet-draining arenas, right?

If Cleveland wins the World Series, for example, Cleveland doesn't really become the source of world power or anything.

Of course, I go to the movies. So, I should really just shut up and leave you to your mindless diversions.

Suzi Riot said...

I'll drink one out of misery, thanks. I'm mortified about UCLA's 20 point loss to Villanova. Sometimes they can pull it out of their ass in the second half. Not today. Inconsistency, thy name is BRUIN!

Time to go get my angry-drunk on.

Grace Nearing said...

If Cleveland wins the World Series, for example, Cleveland doesn't really become the source of world power or anything.

Of course not, just because. However, when the Giants win the SuperBowl, NJ becomes the source of world power; and when the Mets win the World Series, NYC becomes the source of world power. Just because.

Utah Savage said...

I wish I could either get the sports fever of lose my addiction to reading you. It's going to be a long season what with March Madness and Spring Training, or is that already over. Am I unamerican?

My favorite part of this post is the babes. Does that make me gay?

Randal Graves said...

JNRR, I, for one, am enjoying the hot pants in photo number two.

tom, let's have a drink to your having a drink to my statement about having a drink. Should we drink to that, too?

übermilf, merci, for without my mindless devotions, I would have to spend all my time devoted to real life and, well, pshaw.

suzi, you didn't find that 20-point shellacking comical?

grace, I see through your ploy to lure LeBron to the greater NY/NJ area with promises of world domination, but I don't think he wants to leave that giant Free stamp.

utah, unamerican? Naw, just a filthy commie traitor.

That's my favorite part as well, so I'll join you in the lesbian club.

Dr. Zaius said...

When in doubt, read the directions.

Non Je Ne Regrette Rien said...

who's the hell is pshaw and what's SHE got that I don't?!

s said...

Baseball is a sucky sport. It's march madness or did ya forget? And can the girlies, geesh, a hunk would be better. Your a blatant hedonist Randal, and going straight to HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!. Tee hee. Laters big guy.

Sherry Peyton said...

that was me Randal....s....don't know how i didn't get to finish my address! Dumb computer.

And you are still going straight to hell! :P

Border Explorer said...

In my never ending quest to emulate you, Randal, I’ve learned how to trademark Border Explorer ®. Accept no substitutes!

Now, what was your post about?? Sports?

Mary Ellen said...

What Sherry Peyton said.

Later, kiddo. ;-)

Mary Ellen said...

Oops...the rest of my comment got left off. What I meant to say is "What Sherry Peyton said, except the part about baseball being sucky. Baseball rules, basketball is for babies." I agree with her about the part about you going straight to hell, though. :-)

Dean Wormer said...

If that was what baseball umpires looked like I would watch baseball.

Instead they all look like Norm from Cheers.

Dusty said...

I have no clue who will win in Sweet Zombie Jesus Randal..but I do know this:

Every single player I chose will play like shit this year and most likely do time on the happens ever friggin year, I swear to Buddha.

Beach Bum said...

Actually I go to the AA minor league baseball games for the scantily clad ladies gleaming in sweat because the hot and humid South Carolina summers. That is true fantasy baseball for me.

Distributorcap said...

so did you have cleveland state to go all the way --- truth be told

S.W. anderson said...

Randal, don't be put off by math wizardry. The key to the whole thing is pi and coffee.

Randal Graves said...

dr. zaius, what if they're in Japanese?

JNRR, oh, when she harrumphs - I can say no more.

BE, I'm not sure what the major theme was save for "make it up as I go along." Which has proved fruitful.

sherry and nunly, the eventual fate of Randal's eternal soul aside for a moment, I think this should be decided on the court and diamond. So grab balls and bats and hot pants, and I'll be in the stands with a cold one. Rah rah rah!

dean, except for McClelland, but he's a robot and therefore disqualified.

dusty, I just realized that holds is a goddamn category and I have no middle relief. I hate holds.

BB, that sight might almost make me enjoy summer.

dcap, I had them getting blown out by Wake. At least they delayed that for one game.

SWA, he'll be here all week, folks!

Anonymous said...

So what happens if I joined your fantasy baseball league, but missed the draft? Am I automatically assigned players?

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