Thursday, January 14, 2010

Pimpin' ain't easy

Especially when it's me I'm pimpin'.

Check out this fine, fine story. What a set of knock 'em dead linguistic threads, leggy chords up to here. You can't see my hand, but it's very high, trust me. And all it'll cost is your first place vote. C'mon sweet young thing, you know you want it.

Since there are so many entries, just read my sexfully luscious one.

Don't force me to make a pact with the devil.


Übermilf said...

I'm from Chicago and I sell my vote to the highest bidder.

susan said...

More and more I see radical monotheism as a death cult.

Your story, however, is much about life.

MRMacrum said...

You do know that only those who entered a story can vote?

When I saw my story come out as #40, I thought Jeez this is quite the contest. And then what happens almost 200 more stories were entered after mine. I have not read even close to all of them. I just don't have the time. But I have read quite a few. There are some truly talented writers out here in the blogosphere. Some really awesome stuff.

Tengrain said...

The fetid egg secured my vote. But because I did not participate in the contest, according to the rules I cannot vote.

How Can Harold Ford expect to win with rules like that?



Tengrain said...

Oh, I forgot to add, Graves, you swine!

My bad.



Randal Graves said...

übermilf, and then you gun the highest bidder down.

susan, maybe I should start a radical life cult, but an extremely cynical version.

mrmacrum, hey now, I never promised reading comprehension. What do I look like, a library employee?

Yeah, there's some really good stuff there, and as you said, so much of it, that I'll never get around to reading all 200+ tales.

tengrain, O ye of little faith, thou doubtest the awesome power of Harold Ford?

TomCat said...

Randal? Devil pacting?? Again???

Beach Bum said...

Great story, made me feel like I was back at work-which sucked-but the story was great. Quite the paradox.

Tom Harper said...

A pact with the Devil? Oh God no.

First Robert Johnson, then Haiti, and now et tu Randal.

Holte Ender said...

Pimpin' ain't easy that's true
But my, that yellow really suits you.

Michael Hart said...

Okay, I admit get all jittery inside when I have to look up English words.
Leaf dust is not in my dictionary, but honestly? I have never been pimped like that.

S.W. Anderson said...

Fine story, Randal. One might've wished for a bit of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll, but even so it was well and artfully done.

As others have noted, we can't stuff the ballot box for you. However, you've got strong moral support going among your coterie of loyal fans and not-so-innocent bystanders.

Christopher said...

The remarks from deranged Bible thumper Pat Robertson about Haiti angered many.

They were made the same day similarly insensitive remarks were made by the 400lbs. junkie and pedophile Rush Limbaugh.

I can't say I was surprised. After all, both men are hypocrites and both men are lunatics. I've become accustomed to stupid remarks from extremist loons.

Last week, Pope RatNAZI said gay marriage is a threat to creation. I lump his comments in with those made by Robertson and Limbaugh.

Randal Graves said...

tomcat, not me, Pat Robertson!

BB, I'm glad I didn't throw a third-shift reference in there or you might have me liquidated.

tom, I wonder what other nations have made a pact with the devil. I'm certain we have; for starters, just look at all that Big Easy gayness that brought on Katrina.

holte, don't forget those swanky platforms.

michael, I swear it has nothing to do with marijuana, which is illegal.

SWA, I must admit, I'm quite embarrassed at my inability to grasp my mother tongue. But I blame the host, that stuff is supposed to be fine print, dammit.

christopher, hey, if they didn't want to get killed by an earthquake, they should have moved to the Dominican where they could have been killed by an earthquake when the Pill Popping Pederast stopped by for some afternoon delight.

David Barber said...

Have left you a comment my friend. Have you seen how many entered. It takes me all week to get round to reading FFF entries. The whole thing will be over before I get through that lot. You get my vote though.....I don't know what for, but you get it. :-)

Dr. Zaius said...

I have an outfit like that! I wear it to church. ;o)