[Roll 2d6, as if playing Monopoly. No, I won't sell Pointless Avenue.]
2. Olaf, metal!
3. Super duper extra deathy spooky evil Satanic metal bleorg!
4. Music played with sheep guts
6. Plotless chunks of scattershot verbiage
7. Fun with captions
8. Yelling obscenities at passers-by who can't hear
"That's not a post."
9. Beat head against monitor until bleeding, then ask the tech folks for a new keyboard, explaining that that's only melted crayon because it's so gooey
10. Scour Wikipedia
11. Drunk post