Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Hell is other hells (the ones without sex, drugs & rock &/or roll such as the Hell Where People Are Skinned Alive, duh)

Knows what's in a six-demon bag.

Does that mean the library is hell? One does detect from day to hour the deliciously acrid scent of weed wafting through the air off of various tweed-clad professors & tracksuited & ugged students no I'm not naming names but ever since that pseudo-renovation the back stairwell is no longer the hangout of choice for either stoners or amateur filmmakers not that kind of film you sick bastards. Rock &/or roll? Books on the usual suspects (DYLAN UBER ALLES ACHTUNG LENNON/MCCARTNEY MACHT FREI) but admin won't go for Darkthrone as closeout in lieu of less abrasive announcing. Wankers.

As for an activity that has pride of place in the loins of many fine & not-so-fine folks, one does occasionally come across a condom wrapper, though that's as rare as un étudiant not declaring, upon hearing the due date, that he/she/it will return the books sooner rather than then 'cause he/she/it's got a paper on procrastination due tomorrow guffaw never heard that one fourteen billion times over the last two decades. Not all oldies are goodies, bubs & bubettes.

I need a vacation. I hear Venezuela's nice.

"I'll let you know, but first, the massacre, then, the discotheque. Bunga bunga!"

The Bank of Hades card. Don't leave the black pit of despair without it*

All Li'l Edgar dances with is Discover & himself. 

*not accepted in Tartarus or New Jersey. 

Prélude à l'après-midi d'un pretzeldent: I can hear the Cleveland monologuery Q & A'd on the talking picture box -- curse ye, unknown coworker! -- which means I'm well within my right to air guitar to 90 decibels of Negative Plane.

Win the Future™!


Anonymous said...

Dude if you make Ansel's corpse spin one more time I'm gonna take away your pinhole camera AND your landscape/plate camera.


George Eastman
Rochester NY

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

What the hell?? It's Cleveland, isn't it. Although I hear Cincinnati is warm this time of year.

MRMacrum said...

Crack-ing books, Speed reading and stirring the pot-ash is all libraries are good for now? Is that what you are saying?

Randal Graves said...

charles, Louis Daguerre's corpse raised himself from the dead and is shambling after you. Go on, try and steal his soul with your New World gadgetry!

if, my bank account is a huge fan of the staycation. But I look at pictures of other lands & that's almost as exhilarating.

mrmacrum, certainly not. Hours upon hours are spent honing one's minesweeper skill.

Anonymous said...

I just sent Cartier-Bresson to meet Daguerre in the alley. "We'll see who wins this round..." I say, as I twist the ends of my handlebar moustache.

Randal Graves said...

Bah & le humbug, for I shall -- patience, adversary, I must reload my flintlock.

Anonymous said...

I should like to provide you with the powder, I have a special blend made by my friends Spock and Kirk on an unknown desert planet near the Cestus III outpost. Killed a Gorn, should be able to take down little Henri!

Susan Tiner said...

Now I feel guilty about returning my library book this morning, three weeks late.

Tom Harper said...

All right, the complete post. A passport, a new credit card -- what else does one need?

S.W. Anderson said...

Randal, that top photo appears to be some Chinese product box front superimposed on a photo of San Francisco. Chinese Rice-a-Roni, or some equivalent?

Demeur said...

Well after your very own governator and rethuglican legislature gets done hacking your bank account you'll be glad to have a place for a staycation. Or will your new digs be a cardboard box in the alley near the dumpster?
Does bargaining mean we collect and you get nothing?

susan said...

Yet another fiendish plot by Dr. Fu Manchu to rule the world by having his dacoits plunder the library. Nayland Smith and Dr. Petrie will arrive in Cleveland shortly.

okjimm said...

//I need a vacation//

I need some carry-out... is Ray's open? Do they also have hush pupies...or do I have to run over my own dog?

Ricky Shambles said...

Both Cleveland and Cincinnati are chilled by the 9th circle armpit that is Toledo, though here in Cinci we're buffered by the aura of a shitty-team-less Columbus and have no lake for the effect (or affect), all of which equals a similarly gloomy yet slightly warmer clime.

Chef Cthulhu said...

I know it's an incorrect quote but you should check and see if that Bank of Hades card is accepted in the Hell of the Horny Dragons before you apply for one, Mr. Randal Tzu.

Tengrain said...

Graves, you swine!

You've covered all the bases, I got nothing.