Monday, August 15, 2011

Dave's not here, man

For once, I agree with a plain dealing complainer:

"My moan is to the disrespectful people who turned left from Brecksville Road into the McDonald's driveway, through the funeral procession for Sgt. Dennis Kancler. I was standing in the median with my flag. Firemen were standing at attention. People were along the road showing their respect to a fallen Marine. Some inconsiderate people couldn't wait to get their lunch. I was appalled that they did that to any funeral procession, let alone one for a hero."
It is disrespectful to eat at McDonald's when there's a perfectly serviceable East of Chicago down the street.

If you were spaced, your posting would suck, too, but au moins I don't illegally trespass, with illegality, upon the banktacular sacredness of private property, & since we're confabbing the trampling of quality under foot, verily, ich bin hungrig, & the end times are neareth,

oh, it came out of the sky, landed just a little South of Columbus
Randal drank all his vodka, couldn't believe what befell us
Laid on the books and shook fearin' for his life
Then he ran all the way to town* screamin' it came out of the sky

*which is, thankfully, not far


Anonymous said...

That was a funeral procession for a fallen Marine? I thought it was a headlight cult, and I wanted my McNuggets and Big Mac. Semper Mac!

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...


The blimp (like everybody else) won't come downtown unless it has to, for work.

Randal Graves said...

karl of the österreich, headlight cult, now there's an idea for a crap-economy-busting religion. One hero sandwich, please.

if, egads, was that a mild dig at your burg I detected?

thatgirl said...

They don't call them Freedom Fries for nothing!

Jim H. said...

Oh the humanity, reprise. I saw the pic of the downed blimp on the telly this a.m., thought of your previous two posts. It looked like a used condom that had been, shall we say, used for plowing the house. Oh the humanity.

Jim H. said...

Video here:

And all the way through, keep repeating the "The Office" mantra to yourself "that's what she said."

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

if, egads, was that a mild dig at your burg I detected?

Oh, certainly. Columbus used to have a downtown mall, but now it's plowed under and turned into parkland. The new malls up north in the burbs put it out of business.

What this place needs is a subway system (I realize you're a fan of the Wheelie Bus, but I was spoiled by living most of my life in Manhattan).

Liberality said...

that's gratitude for ya I suppose.

shame, shame

Randal Graves said...

thatgirl, oh, snap. (I better not have to pay you royalties)

jim, since I've never seen The Office, can I substitute Office Space and talk about showing my O-face?

if, a shopping mall? You mean Columbus isn't just a system of fields alternating Buckeye practice & cows out to pasture?

liberality, I want to know where's the procession for the dead blimp.

susan said...

I'm happy for the 98 year old lady who probably had given up hope of another bump in the night.

Beach Bum said...

...from Oakland, Calif., to Clemson, S.C., well-intentioned foraging enthusiasts have mapped public fruit trees and organized picking parties.

Clemson!?!?! People seem to forget, South Carolinian rednecks have assault rifles, my brother lives there and they're just plain crazy and love to target practice in that area.

Tengrain said...

Graves, you swine!

It is the rare day when I go out to the alley behind my Hut and not find a hobo passed out, in his tender embrace a bottle of tequila (once full, now not) and a pile of the rinds from my lemon tree nearby.

I looked into the law on this and at least here in Californiastan, if the limb of the tree crosses the property line, the fruit on the limb belongs to the person's whose property it is on. Because the alley is a public through-way, my lemons belong to the public (on that side of the fence).

But the least you could do, you cheap bastard, is offer me some of your booze before you go back to Clevelandistan.



S.W. Anderson said...

I wouldn't be surprised if some of the apparently disrespectful people hurrying to McD's were worker bees with limited time for lunch, and no desire to give their employers a reason to move them up the list of prospective layoffees for the next round of payroll cutting. Some were probably just ignorant, and if they thought at all, they thought those headlights were some kind of protest. Either way, it's kind of sad.

Ubermilf said...

Randal, I decided you've suffered long enough without me. I have returned to blogging.

You're welcome.

Laura said...

See, when our local Hero came back shot up, I stood with my children as he came into town, by the Pizza Hut.
I can be patriotic and practical at the same time.
How smart am I?


Demeur said...

Isn't that what everybody does when they know Mcribs are back for a limited time only?

Randal Graves said...

susan, one must find their jollies wherever they can.

BB, what if the pickers wear camo and they tell the homesteaders that they're on a training foraging mission in preparation for the invasion of Al-Qaedaist Mexcans?

tengrain, only if you give me some of those public lemons. Isn't that a definition of government?

SWA, in this climate, wouldn't telling the bossman they were late returning from lunch due to unscheduled hero worship equate to a get out of jail free card? Unless their boss was a commie or something.

I knew I sensed a disturbance in the force, but I hoped it was Alderaan getting nuked.

laura, now that's how you play the game. And the Freedom Union of Canadian Kudos, Egress & Restitution gives you an extra maple leaf for capitalizing Hero.

demeur, after suffering bags of gel masquerading as chicken nuggets, exactly.