Sunday, March 2, 2008

Meet Zombie George Allen, our new GM













"I know my son is an idiot. But it's not my fault, I was never home!"

We don't need no stinkin' picks, apparently. So, our first, second and third are gone, in addition to talented, yet often injured, cornerback Leigh Bodden, and in exchange we've netted Brady Quinn, Corey Williams and talented, yet often large, defensive lineman Shaun Rogers. At the present moment, an upgrade because one has shown promise, and the other two have shown it on the field. Well, when Mr. Rogers -- ha! -- is motivated. Please won't you be, my nose tackle. Hi, nose tackle.

Of course, DA is still the big question mark. 29 touchdowns, yay, 19 interceptions -- a few bunched in two heartbreaking, give-it-away losses -- nay. But adding the speedy Donté Stallworth will help. See, dguzman, no creaky Zach Thomas around these parts. Maybe your Cowboys can sign him to help in coverage. I think Amani Toomer is still open. Yeah, that was a low blow, but hey, mon amie, that's what you get for rooting for Pure Evil®!

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Looka....football in
Cleveland was doomed when Jim Brown retired. Looka, anyteam with known for having a quarterback named "Milt Plum" is cursed. Forever. Always. Anyteam. Anywhere. Always. Milt Plum. You guys need a Brett. Reality happens. Sorry.

Randal Graves said...

I see your Milt Plum and raise you a Lynn Dickey.

ahab said...

Stallworth is great. I have Eagles season tix and he really helped us last year. Plays extremely fast. I was hoping the Eagles would re-sign him.

Fran said...

You know the whole football thing is lost on me, but I have not been around so I had to at least say hi and pay some homage to you and cthulhu!

Isn't that the father o' macaca?

Anonymous said...

oooppps....Lynn Dickey, forgot about him. Never mind.

Randal Graves said...

ahab, picking up Samuel is big, but yeah, they could use another receiver. It's funny how everything seems to be McNabb's fault, when it's not. :)

fran, thanks for remembering us old chums! And yes, Zombie George Allen did indeed help with the creation of that jackass.

okjimm, exactly. ;-)

B said...

So many changes and unknowns right now. It will be very interesting to see how it all plays out next season!

dguzman said...

"Creaky"???? I'll take my creaky Zach Thomas over your whole Browns team any day, pal!

Besides, everyone knows that the Pure Evil trademark belongs solely to the Detroit Redwings.

Faded said...

Zach Thomas, headed to Big D!

Randal Graves said...

b, you guys just better hope that Tomlinson doesn't get hurt, since your insurance policy is now in Atlanta!

dguzman, hey, if you enjoy a step-too-slow linebacker, be my guest. ;-)

fade, they need someone to buy the beer!

B said...

Yeah, I'm hoping the Chargers' release of Turner is an indication that L.T. will be healthy and shit for next season but I'm still damn nervous. Oh, postseason action... is it September yet?