Friday, June 20, 2008

The Fuckeye State

Once again, I must apologize for the stupidity that seems, despite our best efforts, to nest within my home state. Oh, how they make me so cross.

Xander: Spike.
Giles: What are you doing here?
Spike: Me? I'm not the one out of place here.
Xander: For your information, smarty, we've got a rogue Slayer on our hands. Real psycho-killer, too.
Spike: Sounds serious.
Giles: It is. What do you know?
Spike: What do you need?
Xander: Her. Dark hair, yea tall. Name of Faith. Criminally insane.
Giles: Have you seen her?
Spike: Is this bird after you?
Xander: In a bad way. Yeah.
Spike: Tell you what I'll do then. Head out, find this girl, tell her exactly where all of you are, and then watch as she kills you.

Can anyone of your damn little Scooby club at least try to remember that I hate you all? Just because I can't do the damage myself doesn't stop me from aiming a loose cannon your way. And here I thought the evening'd be dull.
Xander: Go ahead! You wouldn't even recognize her!
Spike: Dark hair, this tall, name of Faith. Criminally insane. I like this girl already.

Xander: We're dumb.

The report confirms that Freshwater burned crosses onto students’ arms, using an electrostatic device, in December. Freshwater told investigators the marks were Xs, not crosses. But all of the students interviewed in the investigation reported being branded with crosses. The investigation report includes a photo of one student’s arm with a long vertical line and a short horizontal line running through it.
Embarrassing, no? Though some aren't all hot and bothered.

Neither Freshwater nor his attorney, Roger Weaver, could be reached for comment last night. Freshwater’s friend, Dave Daubenmire, defended him.

“With the exception of the cross-burning episode … I believe John Freshwater is teaching the values of the parents in the Mount Vernon school district,’’ he said.

Other than burning a cross into the flesh of small children -- and who hasn't thought about doing that, the little shits -- I'm sure he is a swell guy.


susan said...

Did I miss the part about Freshwater being arrested? Can we call Suzi Riot about adding him to her Fucktard of the Week roll?

That's even worse than the graduating 8th grade class at the Catholic school my husband attended giving the (teacher) nun a brand new baseball bat for slamming on the students desks.

I need a martini.

American Hill BIlly said...

I don't know for sure, but if we're talking about dumbass Christians we are on the same page. If that is the case, then this is down right funny....The "Cross" predates Christianity by at least a few thousand years!! The Celtic Druids used it as one of their main symbols: North,South,East,West winds. There are countless other uses of it for different meanings well before the Sheeple....I mean the good Christians took it over from paganism!!

Peace and Freedom

Hill said...

Well, huh

If some very "foolish" teacher had branded my son or daughter or one of my 5 grandsons, pretty sure I'd be getting intimately acquainted with the Texas Penal system.

As a "guest."

Long-term guest.

Mary Ellen said...

Wow, and I thought the nuns were rough, this guy beats them hands down.

I certainly hope the guy isn't still teaching. Is he?

fairlane said...

It wasn't a cross, it was a small case "T."

The kids were having trouble with their book learning, and such.

Westcoast Walker said...

Damn.. Buffy would kick this guy's demon ass back into the stone age if she found him.

Dr. Zaius said...

Ha! It could be worse - he could be burning crosses on someone's front lawn! Sandy Underpants felt the same way about the story.

M.Yu said...

Don't these people know you are supposed to burn crosses on their front LAWN, not on their arms..

geeez... dumb extremists freaks.
Can't do anything right...

Randal Graves said...

susan, why would he be arrested? Think of it as a tattoo, and those things are expensive!

AHB, oh hell, there's a long list of things the Christians thieved and adapted for their own purposes. It's human nature to be thugs and lunatics. Part of our charm, heh.

hill, I'd imagine that if that happened to my kid, there'd certainly be a confrontation with said teacher.

ME, as far as I can tell, not yet, but it is being considered.

fairlane, The New and Improved Hooked On Phonics that uses real hooks!

WW, I think we could use an army of Slayers, don't you?

dr. zaius, don't give them any ideas!

m. yu, but those students will always remember their class with John Freshwater. Now that's teaching!

DivaJood said...

The family of one student who was burned filed a federal lawsuit last week against Freshwater and the district, saying the student’s civil rights were violated.

Civil rights? The child was criminally assaulted. WTF is wrong with these people that they cannot see this is more than a small matter of someone not teaching? And yes, his shoving creationism and (un)intelligent design is NOT teaching, it is also unconstitutional (if we still have a constitution, I think it might be currently on the grocery shelf next to Quilted Northern Tissue). But the actual physical act of burning a brand into the arms of students is just sort of tossed aside. What am I missing here?

DCup said...

Used to be when the Spawn behaved wickedly, we would threaten to send them to military school for a good straightening out.

Now I'm going to threaten them with a stint in Ohio public school psuedo-science class where they have to wear short sleeves and wait quietly while the Bunsen burner makes the metal cross nice and hot.

Randal Graves said...

diva, I've wondered that myself. Hell with firing, shouldn't they have wanted assault charges pressed?

dcup, there's an idea.

"Kids, if you don't start behaving, I'm sending you to a rural, fundie Christian school!"

Utah Savage said...

See what I mean about "certain" Christians? I live in the land of strange Religion. Tales to tell too. They Baptize you after you die, if they didn't get you before you're dead. It's a no win game here trying to stay atheist. Mormons do some supremely strange stuff. Obedient, too. Vote for who their told. Every vote cast for Mitt during the primary came with a little orgasm.

Tom Harper said...

Oh come one, what are these schoolchildren sniveling about? There's nothing like a cross burnt into the arm to instill some good old-fashioned Family Values and an undying love for Jesus.

Someday these students will be thanking this teacher.

Spartacus said...

Whoa... this story made me cringe. I wish I could see the humor in this, but all I could do is wonder how Freshwater kept his job for 11 years, let alone long enough to burn crosses onto skins. I'm curious to know...was there any comment from the principal at his school? What about criminal ramifications? Was Freshwater charged with any crime? This is scary shit.

dguzman said...

You had me at "Spike."