Tuesday, May 6, 2008

What The Hell Have I



Nothing today sir
or madam, as the case may
be, but a grand theft --

not auto, but this
old poetical style
from ancient isles.

A posting so fine
later, unless I do not,
laughing at suckers --

comme moi, 'cause Sony
won't permit embeds of stuff
like this rockin' tune

so don't blame me for
the unmoving space above,
ire at bigwigs.

9 comments:

okjimm said...

Thanks for the link to Maui-Girl's .... I am a part time newmistamatick....numistist, neumistmatizt....aw,shit, coin collector...and I want a few of those.

My morning problem, though, and excuse me if I vent, is some really dear friends, very fiscally conservative, who have begun to bait me with 'Election' jokes.

I opened the office e-mail this morning and found this one:

-Presidential Election Considerations-
"On the one hand we have a bitch who's a lawyer, married to a lawyer; and a lawyer who's married to a bitch who's a lawyer.

On the other side, you have a true war hero married to a good looking woman with nice hooters who owns a beer distributorship.

Why are we even holding an election?"

Not having anywhere near enough caffeine,discovering that all my sales reports from yesterday have 'vanished', plus working a sales program that could easily be described as performing a root canal on a rabid pit bull, I tersely replied:

"The real problem is that the War Hero is really a whore who divorced his first wife to marry a bitch with hooters so he could grab the cash and wants to fuck everyone."

and received a terse reply:

"You seem to be taking this whole thing personal....should I send you a screed about Obama and his Muslim past?"

And, IF that wasn't enough to piss me off.... he sends me a link from the Times:

Mind: I'm Not Lying, I'm Telling a Future Truth. Really.
By BENEDICT CAREY

(if you paste it will take you there. I am too dumb to make links...and my admin assistant is too fucking dumb to find the missing reports)

The Moral is that sometimes, between friends, it is best to talk basketball, beer, bratwurst and babes.

ps I think I should just walk away from my desk and get a fried egg sandwich.

Thanks.

Randal Graves said...

okjimm, I think the proper term is 'hoarder in anticipation of the collapse of the world economy,' but numismatist is nice shorthand.

I think that email left the part out about him doing spots for the VC, the fact that his wife looks like a fucking robot and that Busch takes like polluted runoff, but you succinctly covered those topics.

Good advice on what to talk about. Otherwise, blood boils and if within the vicinity of not-friends, violence might ensue. Fuckers.

Eat that sandwich. It's the good cholesterol, man. Okay, this post bombed, time to find a funny picture of Chimpy.

okjimm said...

It didn't really bomb. Helped bring my blood preasure down. And it wasn't a bad sandwich. $2.89, deli on the first floor.

Tom Harper said...

Great video; love Alica In Chains.

I haven't checked out Mauigirl's post yet but I'll go there next.

Utah Savage said...

You never bomb. You are the best. Keep us sane and give us all some perspective when not writing about sports, and beer and bratwurst, and babes. Even when we be too fucking dumb to get it.

Randal Graves said...

okjimm, your blood pressure went down? Does that mean I don't have to do political posts ever again? Music to my fucking ears!

tom, they did indeed kick much ass. I'm glad I got to see them before Layne became a drug-addled recluse.

utah savage, the only perspective I have is that we're all fucked in the end. The sports, beer, bratwurst, babes and whatever else I can cobble together is merely my version of shiny objects to distract myself from the apocalyptic slow burn.

okjimm said...

I do not mind political posts.....as long as I have a good cache of rolaids, or barf bag handy (comment directed to content, not authorship)----

it just pisses me off that the kids are not in the streets, banging drums,
marching,
protesting,
raising shit.....
kicking ass
because they have the most to lose, and oh, so much more to gain.

Randal Graves said...

Sorry old man, I didn't hear what you said. I was engaging in reefer madness while playing hooky.

okjimm said...

You break me up. Gotta go. Somebody here posted something about music. Gonna see/hear if I can learn something.