Friday, May 30, 2008

Post ex nihilo

How's this for nothing, suckers?















That sign is a bit misleading. If you're in, say, Idaho, the ones and zeros are traveling a bit more than twenty-two miles.
















This is also a bit misleading. It's only about half past nine a.m., therefore quite possible that I end up actually earning a piece of my paycheck today. But I'll try not to, believe me.

Speaking of misleading, we own, pnwn, leet, whatever the fuck you techno-computer dudes and chicks type. I don't play MMORPGs, so I don't know the lingo. Old school console, baby! Sorry, what do we own?

Al-Qaeda!

Al Qaeda is essentially defeated in Iraq and Saudi Arabia and on the defensive throughout much of the world, CIA Director Michael Hayden said in a Washington Post interview published on Friday.

The upbeat assessment came less than a year after the CIA warned of new threats from a resurgent al Qaeda, the Post said.

I'm not a big fan of Scotty's tell-all -- too little, too late, and all that -- so I'm not sure how much of an impact it'll have on the campaigning throughout the course of the summer and fall given 1)most understand that rats always abandon a sinking ship, and






















2)the abysmally short attention spans of nearly everyone -- though some feel differently, and I hope they're right -- but I doubt it'll get bumped out of the news cycle by even this thoroughly documented, examined, vetted, crushing and proven defeat of The Greatest Threat The World Has Ever Known®. Remember your fables, people.

28 comments:

Dean Wormer said...

Speaking of misleading, we own, pnwn, leet, whatever the fuck you techno-computer dudes and chicks type.

That's because you're a noob.

DivaJood said...

And apparently, Bush plans to bomb Iran in August. Unless he has to pay too much for jet fuel, I guess.

Unknown said...

Nothing in this comment either...

puddy said...

i thought bush wanted to bomb the same-sex marriage insurgents in california...

or bomb the extra "c" in connecticut to help him stop mispronouncing the word...

i still can't believe this guy is the freakin president...

Anonymous said...

I think this pandering to the nothing wing of the noob party needs to stop. Now.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Wow!! There is a party at the Noob's! And they are serving Nothing Wings? Personally, I like Nothing Wings with ranch dressing.

Scotty's book? pfffft...I will wait and read the indictments next year....should be better reading.

//How's this for nothing, suckers?//

Ya break me up! Hey, I betcha I do nothing at work better than you do nothing at work. I actually have to work at doing nothing! Nothing does not come naturally to be! I have to work at it!!!

-Al Qaeda is essentially defeated-

So does that mean there will not be a fifth game against the Penguins?

Randal Graves said...

dean, hey, them's fightin' words! Where's my broadsword!

diva, you mean we won't be paying for it? Wow, the Iraq invasion was worth it! Thanks, Chimpy!

mathman, now that's what I like to read. Nothingness!

kreplech, it's best not to think about it, or at least concentrate on such thoughts, exploding skulls, and all that.

dcup, as if we'd do anything with the pandering.

okjimm, if a non-peon from this eight-year debacle serves any jail time (I'm talking administration, not corrupt hucksters like the Dukester) I'll buy you a beer.

You've never seen me do nothing at work. I'm pretty impressive. Imagine the lack of productivity if I had access to porn. It might be negative.

Sorry, the Penguins won the other night, so it'll go at least five. Al-Qaeda lives to fight another day!

B said...

Yes, an "upbeat assessment" that truly is. Hooray, the wicked witch is dead!!

I am going to need to borrow that road sign... I've got absolutely nothing! :)

Anonymous said...

Oh wow, Mr. Graves.....that would be the best beer ever! Shit&Whiskers....I can dream...if anyone around cabinet level is EVEN indicted.... I'll get you a case of wine. (and your own goddam hockey rink if I win the lottery)

DivaJood said...

Well, Randal, the oil companies are making airlines pay cash at time of fuel purchase nowdays, so I expect that the military will have to cough up too.

And, jeeze, Kreplach, I sure hope that Bush doesn't bomb California. I haven't worked on my tan yet this year.

Robert Rouse said...

I got nothing out of this post. :)

La Belette Rouge said...

The nothing you see in this mirror may be closer than it appears.
p.s. I am so politically naive to have some hope that Scotty's book will have some impact. I hope I am right. Ugh! Hope. Hmm, that would be a good campaign theme. A town called hope. What is that? Absolutely nothing for the next 22 miles. Oh, yeah.

DivaJood said...

I have a new title for McClellan's book:

"The Worms Crawl In, The Worms Crawl Out, or the fine art of playing pinnocle on your snout by "Beam Me Up" Scotty McClellan

Unconventional Conventionist said...

I was trying to work up to "upbeat assesment" but all I got was zip, zilch, zero, nada, bupkus.

And re: McClellan; concur - too little, too late.

Randal Graves said...

b, it's hard maintaining my upbeatness, by I do the best I can!

okjimm, aw shit, I better learn how to skate! Hmm, maybe if your winnings are large enough, we can purchase indictments for these jokers. Nothing talks more than cash.

diva, but in the end, we're the ones who end up paying. ;-)

I vood not vorry bout Kal-i-for-na, for I am zee Governator.

robert, then I was successful!

LBR, well, it did add a few lines to this post, so it was good for something. But I naturally assume the worst. Anything above that is gravy.

diva, dammit, I used to know that entire shtick. I think I originally heard it on an episode of the A-Team. Howlin' Mad Murdock. Boy, did that show suck. I was young, not my fault.

UC, hmm, I'm wondering if I should go full time with this 'nothing' motif. Throw up some random crap that will lead to even more random comments. Sure beats researching anything. Not that I've ever done that.

Anonymous said...

Je n'ai pas rien, aussi.

Tengrain

Anonymous said...

Boy....it sure is a dull, dull day here at the ol corporate orfice! +

I think I may read some Ann Coulter...just to feel sick enough to go home....

susan said...

I took the day off so I'm really doing nothing but it's nothing I won't be paying for come Monday since the people I work with work so hard at doing nothing they can never be said to accomplish anything but may be relied upon to complain that I'm not there doing nothing.

So you really aren't a huge fan of 'World of Warcraft'? I couldda sworn I saw your avatar trying to jab mine the other night.

Mary Ellen said...

Another post about nothing. Sheesh.

Here ya go...I'll give you a song about nothing. Charabia (Charlie Chaplin)

Enjoy :-)

Oh, and to answer the the comment you made about paying to go on your blog. I only work in trade, sweetheart. ;-)

Bradda said...

Osama, well, you know, I don't know where he is and to tell you the truth, I don't spend a lot of time thinking about him, you know.

Unknown said...

Since the average worker is actually losing money due to inflation and the rising cost of everything from eggs to gas to toilet fucking paper...good on ya!

As for Scotty, I want him to put his money where his piehole is...as in testifying before the Congress critters with some really awesome revelation that will seal All OF BUSHCO...but alas, I doubt that will happen.

In any case he gets his fifteen minutes of unadulterated fame and we all move on to the General Election..replete with stupid reporting about senseless bullshit that doesn't matter to anyone or the issues at hand.

Unknown said...

oops....as for the revelation about Al Qaeda..please, its propaganda at its finest!

The only thing BushCo has excelled at for eight fucking years..propaganda and of course nationalism..two of the points of Facism I believe..

Utah Savage said...

For twenty two miles of nothing that's quite a thread. Heavyweight's. Elites. Smarty Pants.

Randal Graves said...

tengrain, ceci me fait heureux.

okjimm, you're playing with fire, man. That could put you in the emergency room. Or the psych ward.

susan, normally, I'd respond to your first paragraph, but I got nothin'.

No WOW for me. Let's put it this way: the last computer game I played was Bard's Tale. Three.

ME, oh hell that rules! And I'm sure we can work something out. ;-)

bradda, I'm really not that concerned about him!

dusty, I'd love for him testify, but I wonder that even if there was a parade of minions baring their wretched souls before that august (as in the month of August, you know, sweltering, annoying fucking heat that makes you want to stab things) body, some of the grunts would see jail time. This administration has proven, nearly more than any other, that you can commit crimes and get away with them.

That's not fascism, that's patriotism! We need a new HUAC!

utah, I don't know how elite I am. When I'm jonesing for some ice cream, I don't usually buy Häagen-Dazs. That shit is expensive!

Tom Harper said...

That traffic sign "absolutely nothing, next 22 miles" reminds me of one of Sam Kinison's monologues. (He was this crazed gonzo comedian, killed in a car accident in 1992.) He was talking about the empty highway leading to Barstow, CA. He said there should be a sign saying "nothing for 100 miles." And then he screams "YOU'RE LUCKY YOU'VE GOT AIR, ASSHOLE!!!" Anyway, you had to be there.

The only thing good about Scotty's tell-all book is that rightwing bloggers are having a mass pantytwist over it.

Unknown said...

That is the only saving grace for me too Tom.

As for Sam, I did love that man's style..too bad he lived so hard and close to the edge.

I pass through Barstow on my way to Vegas and your not lying about that area. Also, didn't Sam die on that road on his way in or out of Vegas? I might be remembering wrong..but thats my story and I am sticking to it.

Randal Graves said...

tom, hey man, I'm not that young! I remember Kinison fondly. What's sad is that he was cleaning his life up. Then he turns around and gets killed by one of the demons he was dealing with.

dusty, I believe it was one of the two, going to or coming from a show. I'll remember his role in Back To School (say it! SAY IT!) and a that hell sketch from In Living Color.

Anonymous said...

And apparently, Bush plans to bomb Iran in August. Unless he has to pay too much for jet fuel, I guess.Sports Good
India sports