Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The Name Game

"My name is Guy Incognito. Might I trouble you for a meme?

DCup, if I was a recipient of some of that sweet bailout cash, I'd set you and Mathman up with some swanky digs as a reward for giving me something to post about this evening as I remain here at work. Still. I should just set up a goddamn cot and hot plate in the back.

What, you thought I'd wax wonky on crap like this or this? Yawn. I've got a suggestion of slasheriffic fun to help pare down the debt: it begins with Penta and ends with gon. Speaking of all things R. Lee Ermey, Gates? Really? The one area where Dems are still a bit on the weak side of things in the mind of the unwashed masses but have been improving and you're keeping a gooper around? Not unexpected after all the recent blathering amidst those in-the-know, mais c'est la vie. At least Brennan's out.

That sound? Oh, that's merely the cacophony of lefty purists banging their heads against the wall until their sneakers are lost in the pooling blood while post-partisan pragmatists pound their fists in glee at Obama's chess mastery.

Ignore it, for it'll become background noise like the idle chit-chat of passers-by and the low-grade rumble of planes, trains and automobiles.

Oh yeah, the meme.

The rules are below. No official taggees, but hey, if you're strainin' to do some explainin', here's your chance.

Other Names Meme:
1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names): John Anne. Certainly nondescript. Good work, team.
2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad): Gustav Raymond. Gustav? For NASCAR? Oh well, no Billy Joes in this family.
3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 2 letters of your last name, first 4 letters of your first name): Grrand. Moff Tarkin? At least I'll finally wield some power.
4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal): Black Raven. That sounds like an employee of a burlesque house.
5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you live): Michael Cleveland. That sounds like a detective.
6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite alcoholic drink, optionally add “THE” to the beginning): Grey the Wine. No matter which way I go, it would sound very unheroic. Grey the Pinot Noir! Grey the Chenin Blanc! I'm sure someone is Red the Whiskey Sour.
7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name): Raes. That's more sci-fi than fly.
8. GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie): Neapolitan Oatmeal Raisin. Sesame Street gangsta, maybe. Who picked these?
9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pet’s name, current street name): Simba Maplecrest. Kinda pales before Mick Jagger or Buck Dharma.
10. PORN NAME: (1st pet, street you grew up on): George Kenneth. I'll be your ambassador to love.

"That's Kennan, dumbass."

Close enough.



Mberenis said...

Most people don't realize how much money there is out there. During economic times like this, there is more money to be had than ever. Because of the bailouts and economy, lenders are bending over backwards to bail you out too. Believe it or not, there is people getting tons of cheap money nowdays to start businesses, buy homes, pay off debt, and more. Bailouts for Everyone

okjimm said...

// pooling blood while post-partisan pragmatists pound //

STUFF!!! Shit! you score with an explict jump shot and then abet neo-lingusistic impaired neophytes with new rules.

It ist tuesday before a holiday... I hate rules.

susan said...

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
Seeing Randal Grave's impression of the countenance it wore..

KELSO'S NUTS said...

GRAVES: I don't know nothing about no fuckin word games but you are absolutely right about Penta and Gon.

Today was a wonderful epiphany for me. I realized that until I see by actions not words I have to assume that Obama is a smarter George W. Bush. Their views are IDENTICAL. ON EVERY ISSUE.

McCain and Palin were on PLANET HITLER, so let's not even discuss that.

When you can SHOW me with an ACTION or a STATED POLICY how Obama and George W are different I'll revise my thinking. But boyo did MR CHANGE step on his dick today.

This was the greatest performance in the history of hypocrisy. No tax cuts for working people. Keep Bush's tax cuts for the rich. Tell Hugo Chavez and Dmitriy Medvedev that all they have is "tug boats". Promise an unending series of bank bailouts and call it a "stimulus package."

I've said it before and I'll say it again. The greatest tragedy of this election was that Democrats found Obama more physically attractive than they did Dennis Kucinich and the Republicans bought that POW bullshit fairy tale instead of picking the smart conservative Ron Paul.

Those were the only candidates who told nothing but truths and were right about everything when it counted.

The Republican Party is going to become SUPER HITLER going forward and the Democratic Party is so paralyzed with White Guilt that it is incapable of having a point of view.

FranIAm said...

Gustav Raymond? Is that a Nascar driver with a Ph.D and a baby grand piano?

Terencesambowrites said...

Mccain and Palin hhmmn no comments

Randal Graves said...

Bailouts for everyone? Wasn't that a line from Back to School?

okjimm, the Tuesday before a holiday, this particular one in fact, is the eve of a prime slack day and thus, holy. Break out the alcoholic beverages!

susan, "Though thy avatar be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven.
Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from The Google shore -

kelso, I can see that, at least on paper, his domestic stuff on a macro scale is certainly far beyond anything Chimpy would've attempted, but in order to PAY for such things, the money has to come from somewhere, and we all know who gets the biggest slice of the pumpkin pie.

And I love how every politician of every stripe brings up the farmer handouts. Sure, I don't want big ole factory farms getting money, but $49 million in subsidies? What's the line about a billion here and a billion there and then we're talking real money?

What bothers me too isn't the fact that those classed as 'pragmatist' - define THAT word in this day and age in Murka - sing a chorus of 'just wait, just wait.' Just waiting is what gets one into trouble.

It's always in the action, but since the action won't start to be filmed for another two months, I don't see anything wrong with critiquing the script. Sure, Gates may not be über-neocon - I know I'm odd to automatically distrust an Iran-Contra/CIA guy, sue me - but there wasn't a Democratic military man out there that would've taken the post? Oh, well. And I love how an AP article on the same thing talking about him as the architect of Bush' 'successful' surge strategy.

Ah, here's the bailout link I was looking for. I was sure you'd find this comical.

fran, I left my piano in the woods somewhere. Have you seen it?

terence, everyone loves Grandpa Walnuts and Mooselini 'round these parts!

Dean Wormer said...

I don't have a problem with Gates as long as he's gone in a year as discussed.

It looks to me like Obama's trying to pull off a magic trick using misdirection. Watch what this hand's doing while the other one takes your watch.

Angie said...

My favorite is your gangsta name and as for the NASCAR name... well, you might want to wear a bullet proof vest when you step out on the track. A name like that either makes you foreign or gay and as my cousins who are big NASCAR fans would shout at you, NEITHER of those are acceptable ideas. I just can't wait for Thanksgiving this year...

Suzan said...

I can't help but think that John Abizaid or one of the others who refused to follow Cheney's orders would have been a more diplomatic choice for Obama's change supporters (after all, they did get the most votes).

But that's my opinion (and you know what they say about those).


KELSO'S NUTS said...

GRAVES: Agree on Gates...velly, velly scarey, keeeds, for folks down here!

ADMIRAL WILLIAM J FALLON works pretty great for me but he's kind of like the Dennis Kucinich of flag officers!

Randal Graves said...

dean, I still think they should just make him sit in the corner with a dunce cap on his head. Or grab someone like Zinni. Hell, retirement can't be too exciting for Shinseki, right?

But most would throw me in the purist camp instead of the pragmatist one, so take everything I say with a bowl of salt, you neocon. ;-)

angie, Gustav could handle the insults. The bullet? Not so much.

suzan, we've all got them. I just like ours better!

kelso, are you saying that Fallon isn't a strikingly handsome devil?

Anonymous said...

I understand the theory of Gates, still I am not particularly happy about it. But I trust Obama, so I'm not yelping.

And I'm expropriating the MEME cuz it's a fun one!

Anonymous said...

All I can say is if oatmeal raisin is your favorite cookie, you should not be surprised by the results.

Ambassador of love. It has a rather poetic ring to it.

Thank you for the link, precious.

Please forward all hate mail from oatmeal raisin cookie lovers to me. Thank you.

Randal Graves said...

afeatheradrift, I trust no one, but he's at least at zero. Chimpy was about -72 billion.

Steal away, it ain't my property!

dcup, I and my good friend Wilford Brimley are in shock and awe at the continued hatred by society upon the deliciousness that is the oatmeal raisin. I think it's time we start poppin' caps, yo.

KELSO'S NUTS said...


That's the double-dicking of it. Fallon is much better looking that Gates is.

KELSO'S NUTS said...

GRAVES: I loved your Boom-Boom Geoffrion reference on RDB so much, I've decided to reward you by playing.

Other Names Meme:
1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names): NOAH JOYCE

2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad): DAVID AVRAM (RIGHT! Like there would ever be a driver named that!)

3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 2 letters of your last name, first 4 letters of your first name):


4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal): BLACK MANTIS: Written and directed by Sterling Silliphant. Starring Fred Williamson!

5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you live): DANIEL PANAMA! (Poifect)

6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite alcoholic drink, optionally add “THE” to the beginning): TEAL THE BOURBON

7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name):


8. GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie):


9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pet’s name, current street name):


10. PORN NAME: (1st pet, street you grew up on):