Yeah, I know it's beans and not books, but I couldn't think of a clever title.
Anyway, ever since I got chopped in half (old school Obituary, fuckers!), thereby forcing me to wave goodbye to my career as the gangly cracker towel collector on the end of an NBA bench who receives his annual two minutes of playing time in the fourth quarter of an April blowout before being released to tend bar as a local semi-celebrity back in Militiaville, Idaho -- every team has to have one, check the collective bargaining agreement -- I got sucked into the geeky yet lusty alternate dimension of bookdom. Smart is sexy, no? I believe that my tagger would agree with me.
"Which begs the question, why did she tag you."
Good point, especially since I had to pilfer from the Simpsons for the 387,446th time. An original thinker I am not, but I play a mean game of paper football when not sprawled out on the couch watching DVDs and stuffing my face with Funyuns.
1. Name a few of your favorite books.
In Search of Lost Time, Les Fleurs Du Mal, The Lord of the Rings, Là-Bas, The Complete Poems and Tales of Edgar Allan Poe, Salammbô, The Odyssey and a whole bunch more.
2. Is there an author that you don't like, yet so many people seem to love?
Oh hell, I don't know, probably whomever is slotted in the various top ten sales lists, but since I haven't read the vast, vast majority of them, I cannot say yay or nay without accurately being labeled a dirty, filthy liar or a congressman. What I can say is that I doubt I'd be waving the bloody towel for the Tom Clancys of the world or the circus freaks who churn out various permutations of The Secret Path to Quasi-Mystical Happiness Through Better Self-Osmosis and Feng Shui Vegetarian Cookery. Most of the crap I read was written by people who finished their subterranean rotting decades, if not centuries, ago. Now pass that bitter yet tasty plate of charred animal parts.
3. Name a book to film adaptation that you really like. Name one you think was done poorly.
Bram Stoker's Dracula. Fuck you, it's good [insert own Keanu Reeves joke here if so inclined, his performance isn't a dealbreaker for me] and I liked that Anthony Hopkins played Van Helsing a shade over the top. Vampire lore, death, cleavage, exchanges of bodily fluids, a killer score, fabulous visuals, more death, what's not to love? Okay, zero zombies, but no movie is perfect.
Various Stephen King reimaginings have been mediocre, but for some reason, I still harbor a soft spot for the 1979 cut of Salem's Lot with David Soul, James Mason and young n' frisky Bonnie Bedelia.
4. Where do you buy your books?
The internets, Half Price Books, Old Erie Street before they semi-closed. Of course, the truly expensive ones I simply borrow and horde, keeping them from the rest of you.
5. What genre do you read the most?
Swashbuckling tales of ancient derring-do, defiance in the face of those on the throne and the romancing of sultry babes. You know, history. Et bien sûr, fiction and poetry, usually buckets o' nineteenth-century frog stuff.
6. What genre do you dislike?
Current events, for starters. All those unopened covers concealing delicious, antique creative goodness and I'm supposed to waste my time scarfing down shit I read about six months ago in The Google?
7. Is there a book that has changed your life?
They all do, no? Whether the degree of change lasts for five minutes or five years is an entirely different matter. Everything fluctuates. Except the views of a bloodthirsty wingnut or a card-carrying corporate hack of the DLC.
8. Have you ever met an author? What author would you like to meet?
Not any live ones, but Neil Gaiman is coming to Cleveland in October and thankfully not on a Saturday.
Bibliophile powers, activate! Form of, a tag! La Belette Rouge, thatgirl, spartacus (file it away for your triumphant return to online slackerdom)