"Golly, Sgt. Carter, why do you want me to put these in order from most to least surprising?"
"It's a test of your limited mental capacity, Pyle! Now get moving!"
1) United States 2, #1 world ranked Spain 0, their first loss in 35 matches.
"I guess that's what those Spaniards get for taking the land of our sixteenth-century white, Christian ancestors, right Sgt. Carter? Shame, shame, shame."
2) Shaquille O'Neal is traded to the Cavs for a second round pick, spare tank parts and an extra sandwich from the mess hall.
"Tony Danza? Dick Butkus? I'm confused Sgt. Carter!"
3) National Lampoon's Afghan Vacation
"Shazam! I think I finally understand this terrorism thing, Sgt. Carter!"
"Try again, Pyle!"
"Extra credit for Übermilf! Pyle, drop and give me twenty!"