Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Awesome, totally awesome! Alright Hamilton!

Whatcha gonna do when your neighbor comes for you!

If it's the chick across the street & down a way, yes, well, hrm, once again, the Sword of Austerity™ plays its cards right 'cause once we're all laid off, it's either be rehired at minimum wage into the university's nonexistent-but-its-time-is-a-coming See Something, Say Something Badge Patrol Brigade, or flip grease at Mickey D's which is at least within walking distance of Chez Randal joke's on you, security state.


Laura said...

Hmmm... I'd like to put some bad guys in jail too. Actually, I was just watching some porn about that very thing the other day.
Those were some *bad* boys. :P

Can I have some extra pickles on my burger please? :)
Merci buckets.


thatgirl said...

I'm sure that Balko 'the Agitator' is probably having a fit.

These volunteers do kind of seem like law enforcement cannon fodder though. "Oh hey, you go knock on doors and deal with the gangbangers. We'll be back here in the car reading the newspaper or whatever if it gets crazy. Then we'll break out the assault rifles."

On the other hand, this does mean that Nancy Drew and Scooby Doo will have to come out of retirement.

Do you think children's mystery novels and tv shows are pretty much a form of suburban cracker "cops are all good" propaganda?

That's what I'm starting to wonder.

Randal Graves said...

laura, what, no hockey replays or SCTV reruns? You keep on ruining perfectly good cultural stereotypes of Canada, dammit!

Extra pickles, aw yeah.

thatgirl, Pamela Sue Martin, you police state tool, you *lied* to me!

"I would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for these meddling volunteers" just doesn't have the same ring to it.

okjimm said...

let's just get rid of ALL public employees and staff with unpaid volunteers..... librarians first. Books are evil! Librarians are nasty.... Outlaw Librarys and the then only Libyans will have Libya!!!

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Did you know that once the Sword of Austerity™ plays its cards right, you will have to wait a few months before getting COBRA health care coverage, and have to take a physical at that point, too? Also.

Thanks to Barrycare/Health Insurance Company Wetdreams, Inc.

Guess how I know this?

Anonymous said...

On the (+) side, it identifies thugs in the neighborhood, identifies them for easier access to pranking etc.

On the (-) side, acting on that identification becomes more dangerous because of the buddy-buddy relation to the Boys in Blue.

Which probably explains why the urge to "volunteer" to help "fight crime." Gotta wonder what these vols do to fight white collar crime though, eh?

Randal Graves said...

okjimm, as long as we don't have to dress like Gha/Kha/Qa-dafi, very few can pull off sporting threads like that.

if, why would I want health care from a cobra? They're poisonous!

charles, much easier to get one's law n' order on against the dude down the block than a fenced-off mansionista. Semper fudge!

Tom Harper said...

Oh boy, volunteer for the police department -- I've found my calling.

"Officer, oh Ossifer, those boys over there are smoking marijuana and looking at dirty magazines."

S.W. Anderson said...

Randal, any public employee with your state's choice of governeuter has one sane career path. It's the interstate that can get you the hell out of there.

susan said...

You might consider high speed pizza delivery as a future career option.

Susan Tiner said...

I love the label you picked for this post.

Qa-dafi's sense of fashion makes Lady Gaga look tame.

Liberality said...

white collar criminals become elected officials Oxtrot and they are above the law.

bad cops mostly but the one's in Wisconsin who have joined the protesters are pretty darn nice I'd say.

Beach Bum said...

Golly gee willikers I know those important and fancy dressed bankers and CEO's sure appreciate how we poorer folks are sacrificing trival things like public education, community safety, and smooth roads so they can have all those big homes, boats, and jets. Maybe one day their good fortune will trickle down to us little people. It should be easy for them to send it our way, they piss on us all the time.

Randal Graves said...

tom, dirty magazines? You just outed your age, pal. Wouldn't whipper snappers download hardcore onto an iPad?

SWA, you're just saying that so you and your minions can steal Lake Erie's fresh elixir in advance of the inevitable water wars. You can't fool me.

susan, not a bad idea. Gimme some time to toss a .50 cal turret in the jeep.

susan t, an undeniable classic. Like the Colonel. He should go on tour as one of her backup singers.

liberality, we'll see how they are the next time there's a protest that doesn't involve an issue near & dear.

BB, trickle down's not a big fetish among most. That's more of a Vitter thing.