Characters
Miss Prunella Vulgaris, The Duchess of Hammer-on-Dulcimer, esteemed member of the Peonage
Juan, The Earl of Valdez, less esteemed member of the Peonage
Bear, bait and loveable ursine scamp
Snowpocalypse, noted archfiend
Library, interior, nighttime. SNOWPOCALYPSE's Artificial Contraption of Contrapuntal Precipitation has trapped DUCHESS and EARL in a Doppler Spiral of Infernal Immobility.
EARL: What a gaff. I feel like I'm in a bad episode of Placeholder Place.
DUCHESS: But you repeat yourself.
EARL: 'tis another snow job, 'tis.
SNOWPOCALYPSE: I snow what you mean.
DUCHESS and EARL: Snowpocalypse! You hold a candle to the devil!
SNOWPOCALYPSE: I know you are. But what am I.
Snow continues to fall.
EARL: You won't get away with th -- hey!
DUCHESS: Are you two alright?
EARL: Where's the fucking stage manager? Fake snow, dumbass, fake! It's hot as fuck in here, this is gonna melt and now I smudged my makeup. Wardrobe!
SNOWPOCALYPSE: Erm, should I stay in character?
DUCHESS: Shhh! The audience can hear you!
SNOWPOCALYPSE: What audience?
DUCHESS: Good point. Anyway, to wrap this up, Bear stopped toking long enough to drive his super off-road dayglo horse-drawn carriage through the drifts to save the Peonage, keeping the world safe for the noble pursuit of book learning. Bravo.
SNOWPOCALYPSE: We're still getting paid, right?
DUCHESS rolls her eyes as SNOWPOCALYPSE shakes his fist towards the heavens in a combination of haughty hubris and ash-in-mouth defeat like all supervillains do after finding out there's no cold cut tray backstage.
fin
33 comments:
Should I be glad that I'm living The Life down here in Dixie where the thought process is questionable, but the skies rarely shed dandruff?
My pseudonym/fake lead singer of a band name just got more awesome thanks to the addition of a duchy. Though if I was a swanky high class companion to rich and wealthy, it might have to be Prunella "Snickers" Vulgaris.
Excellent improv, R.G.
My "Intro to Improv" class just ended, but I'm thinking of taking the next series because it was a hoot.
~
...in the wings, a knuckle-dragging, wifebeater-wearing, pornstache-sporting, TransAm-driving Giuseppe Seispacko: BOO-YAH!
(he stands in for me)
lisa, each & every locale has its archfiends, perhaps there's some mechanical rush hour traffic car that transforms into a peach-throwing trebuchet that you should be wary of.
thatgirl, if Milky Way joins Snickers & Skittles, would their incorporated escort service be called 3 Musketeers?
if, what's your motivation?
charles, Snidely Camaro, you rakish cur!
The Escorts win! The Escorts win!
All for one and one for all.
BWAH!
if, what's your motivation?
And I knew if I had my giraffe
That I could make those people laugh...
~
I can think of worse places than a library to be trapped inside during a blizzard - especially if you were there to provide the entertainment. Placeholder Place was a great series.
That sounds interesting!
Federico Fellini has nothing to fear from your quarter, Randal. This is interesting, but you need to work in a love triangle or maybe an inner Oedipal conflict in Bear.
The term "Snowpocalypse" has possibilities, though. Especially hereabouts after what we experienced in November and February.
Ash in your mouth? I had no idea you were observant. Welcome to Lent, hopefully there will be no more snow.
Japan suffers from one of the largest earthquakes in history. It may be sending a cloud of radioactive fallout our way and this is the best you can do? Pffft! Better do better than that. A little snow melts in a few weeks he said rearing back with his rotten tomato.
if, hungry hungry hippos.
susan, don't forget the delicious vending machine fare housed in our beautiful brutalist lobby.
SWA, 'twas a half-act play, sir, a minimalist gut shot is the goal, & I think achieved. Snowpocalypse scares you, doesn't he.
susan t, I decided to give up not giving up.
demeur, what if radioactive fallout bring back a killer tomato attack? Is the world honestly ready for a fourth sequel?
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