Monday, December 10, 2007

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly 13

The Good: Jamal Lewis' game-sealing Manly Run of Manliness, Derek Anderson was sharper than last week and the defense probably played their best - admittedly not saying much - all-around game...

The Bad: ...until the last six minutes. Then again, the entire team mastered the art of invisibility until Jamal took over. But Romeo, and the other thirty-one coaching flavors, listen up: UNLESS YOU ARE UP BY THREE TOUCHDOWNS WITH FIVE SECONDS LEFT, STOP USING THE FUCKING PREVENT DEFENSE. JESUS H. LUCIFER, IT DOESN'T FUCKING WORK.

The Ugly: The above was also very grotesque, as was the unexpected special teams drop-off. But nothing has been as sickly and creepy as the precipitous fall of the Cavs sans LeBron. The rest of you guys aren't NBA players? Fucking hell, stop looking lost. Thank Mammon we're in the East.

Up next: home versus the city Willis McGahee hates, Buffalo. If it wasn't for our own sporting misery, I'd feel sorry for this town. They've been stabbed in the gut and kicked in the nuts nearly as often as we have been. But since I don't feel sorry for them, I hope they play quite poorly. Nearly time for the p-word!

8 comments:

Mary Ellen said...

UNLESS YOU ARE UP BY THREE TOUCHDOWNS WITH FIVE SECONDS LEFT, STOP USING THE FUCKING PREVENT DEFENSE. JESUS H. LUCIFER, IT DOESN'T FUCKING WORK.

Laughing my ass off! You sound just like me when I'm watching football, only I have a lot more to scream about...damned Bears.

La Belette Rouge said...

Will this series continue when football season is over? Cause this delightful husband stealing sport has only one month left. Right? ;-)

Snave said...

I have to admit I was pulling for the Jets in that game. I do like the Browns, and I do think Derek Anderson is a pretty decent QB; I like seeing players from Oregon schools do well. However, Kellen Clemens is not only from my alma mater (University of Oregon), he is also from the town my grandparents used to live in. My family and I would go there twice a year, from the time I was a baby until grandma and grandpa were gone.

I had the opportunity to meet Clemens briefly a couple of years ago after he had a record-breaking performance of some kind against the Washington State Cougars in a road game. He and his family came into the restaurant where my Duck-fan buddies and I were eating.

I told him "Wow, that was some Duck game today! I don't know about that quarterback, though..."

Clemens hung his head in mock shame and said "Yeah, he kinda sucked...!" Then he popped up, smiled, shook hands and introduced himself. Once he found out I was also from eastern Oregon and that I knew his hometown of Burns, OR fairly well, he became quite talkative. He got a big laugh when I told him about how my grandpa and I would roll large rocks off the top of Steens Mountain (the east face of Steens is a roughly-5,000-foot escarpment!) His sisters were there, and they are extrenely athletic, all-state volleyball and hoops, etc.

Grandpa was a saddlemaker known by everyone in SE Oregon, and of course Clemens' parents had known him. It was lots of fun to talk anyway, and Kellen didn't seem to mind the brief intrusion.

So, maybe you can forgive me for being a Jets fan this past weekend. Maybe not. If you can't? Well, f...

just kidding, of course!

Go Browns, go Jets, and go Seahawks (my top team and regional team).

As for the Cleveland hoops team, it is sad to see them suddenly go from the Cavaliers to the Cadavaliers. I have gone through that with the U of Oregon Ducks football team since it lost star QB Dennis Dixon. It's funny how sometimes one player can make the team go, and without him the team gets lost. At least the Cavs have Gibson, who is giving a couple of my Yahoo! fantasy NBA teams some good numbers. Of course I am a Portland TrailBlazers fan, and the knee problem of Greg Oden is like a huge dark NBA cloud hanging over me and thousands of other Oregon fans. His young teammates are responding well, and not doing too badly, all things considered.

Randal Graves said...

ME, if we can go from 4-12 to possibly a wild card spot, I wouldn't worry TOO much. There's still some talent in Chicago, and the NFC is still pretty crappy save for the top 2-3 teams.

LBR, I'll keep it going just for you. Free agency and draft talk! :)

Snave, you are permanently banned from my blog! :) As for the Blazers, very bright future. Just remember, Amare Stoudemire came back from microfracture to be All-NBA first team. I think Oden will have a great career.

pissed off patricia said...

The Dallas Cowboys are to blame for a zillion fans suffering heart attacks yesterday. Waiting until there are only seconds left in a game to win it, isn't funny for those of us watching.

Colleen said...

I have nothing but the Seahawks and a very expensive stadium to pay for.

Vaguely random thought.

Randal Graves said...

POP, yeah, homefield advantage is terrible, isn't it. Waaa. ;-)

Colleen, they're 9-4 and I wouldn't rule them out as a darkhorse at all. As for the stadium, that's one thing about pro sports that's evil. A multi-billion dollar industry, and the peons pay.

b said...

I was more invested in this game than usual, given that Derek Anderson is from my alma mater (sorry, Snave) and was up against Clemens, who is from our rival school. And truly, I do like to see Cleveland do well. :)

Like Snave, I do want to see Oregon teams do well. The fall of Dixon was tragic and I was truly hoping to see the Ducks and Dixon succeed this year. And it was a blow for us Trailblazers fans when we heard about Oden. But I'm with you Randal in thinking that his future remains bright and in turn, so does that of the Blazers.

P.S. How about that Chargers win this weekend?! Holy hell was that great fun to watch at the end. Gotta love L.T.