Monday, December 17, 2007

My kind of snow bunny


















I've been castigated - rightly so, I might add - for the godawful picture of Der Leader - our beloved dictator - I slapped up this past Saturday morning which apparently induced vomiting, nightmarish hallucinations and liquor stores throughout the country running out of their inventory within hours. Even my clever paraphrase of a mighty Zep tune wasn't enough to dull the throbbing pain. So, as a further part of my ongoing penance, I promised to put up more pictures of my lovely wife in order to increase the class, sorely lacking, of this blog. Hence, the snapshot of home above - and this plea:

I've sort of kinda possibly occasionally remotely not really never been good at all this year, so Jesus Claus and Santa Christ and Mithras and Sol Invictus and Humphrey Bogart, can I pretty please with sugar and vast stacks of cash and a human sacrifice find her dressed like that under the Christmas tree next Tuesday morning?

Sigh. Well, back to work.

















Je te renvoie mon amour, mon bonbon.

18 comments:

TomCat said...

Purrr!!

Tom Harper said...

Santa says you've been so good you're gonna find Laura Bush under your tree next Tuesday.

Who Hijacked Our Country

Mary Ellen said...

Is that the sugar plum that keeps dancing in your head, Randal?

Man, you'll use any excuse to put up a pic of a hot chick...everyone was upset over the George Bush picture my eye! :-D

Candace said...

Tell Santa to leave a very large (human-size) stocking under the tree and see what's there Tuesday morning! (Oh, um, it wouldn't hurt to put a diamond necklace in there or the keys to a new Lexus, you know, at the bottom.)

b said...

Yes...finally. A beautiful angel and football images! :) Seriously, your wife would dress up like that angel for you, wouldn't she? :)

Colleen said...

You are a cheeky dude.

Randal Graves said...

Tomcat, you got that right!

Tom, that's just cruel. I'd rather have the lump of coal. At least that is useful.

ME, 365 days a year! And hey, those comments were tame, you should have seen all the vitriolic emails I received, sniff. Not that you're necessarily wrong. ;-)

Candace, know anyone who has a diamond necklace or the keys to a Lexus that I can borrow?

b, scantily clad ladies and football in a blizzard. Now that's class. ;-) It'd have to be at 3 am because the kids will probably be up by 4!

colleen, I will take that as a compliment and not as an allusion to me being daft.

DCup said...

The sacrifices you make for your readership.

Thank you,sir.

Randal Graves said...

I just want you all to know, especially during this holiday season, how much I care.

Candace said...

Randal, nope, I don't know where to get bling like that, even though I live in Big D.

Every year at this time, the airways are full of commercials for diamond jewelry and Lexi pictured with big red bows on them. Those ads are directed to that infamous top two percentile of the population, many of whom live here.

Of course I was using the snark about the bling incentive, but I swear, here in Dallas, there are tons of women (not of the um, professional type) who would get buck nekkid for bling like that without realizing they just named their price. I think they are prolly ex Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders, most of 'em...

Randal Graves said...

We get those commercials, too, fancy cars wrapped in bows and jewelry ones. "Every kiss begins with Kay." Um, every kiss begins with paying the fucking bills, not a hunk of pressed and heated carbon.

I might get buck nekkid if it'll help get the Chimp out of office and into a jail cell, but certainly not for a fancy watch or a car. :)

Dr. Zaius said...

Sandra Lou is cuter, and she can sing and speak French. She can even sing in French!

Randal Graves said...

Dr. Zaius, you and I both know there's only one way to settle this: steel cage jello wrestling between Alessandra and Sandra Lou!

Colleen said...

Randal, Of course it is good compliment. Ditto for geek, nerd, dork..very en vogue.

Randal Graves said...

Hell, then I'm the most en vogue dude on the planet.

Freida Bee said...

I'll have you know that I approached her for this very noble purpose to which you claim need, and I am so sorry, she digs me and my hubby. You can take the poet laureate thing, k? K, Randy?

Oh, Santa Christ (my favorite words in the whole thing, of course besides Jesus Claus,) you'll never speak to me with your written words again will you for stealing yer wife?

I hope this won't be canceling the jello match though. There's no need to go that far. I may have to moderate the damn thing, in the ring there.

Oh, I'm going to sweet hell. That's in the North Pole, right?

Randal Graves said...

Oh, where to begin with this affront to my faux manliness and lordship of my castle and various other out-of-date macho behaviors?

First, it's obvious that with my stunning, movie-star good looks and vast gobs of cash, gold and precious jewels, the château in the French countryside and the house in Tuscany she would never leave me.

But please, I wholeheartedly accept your offer to referee said match. I'll be front row center.

Yes, hell is located there, but the combination of the eternal fires of damnation coupled with miles-thick layers of ice means that - oh, shit, global warming. Yeah, it'll be pretty fucking hot. Dress accordingly.

Dr. Zaius said...

"Dr. Zaius, you and I both know there's only one way to settle this: steel cage jello wrestling between Alessandra and Sandra Lou!"

Tell you what. I will jello wrestle both Alessandra and Sandra Lou, if you can arrange it.