I thought about waxing poetic -- hey, it's Samuel Taylor Coleridge's birthday! Hell with my substandard tripe, go read the works of a true master -- on this story about dinosaur tracks, but I soon realized that instead of calling down the murderous wrath of the assassin who singlehandedly eliminated such a dominant superorder upon revelation of said nefarious deed, I figured I'd shut the hell up instead.
"Idea good. Grrr. Poems gay. Grrr."
"I can't believe you killed all the dinosauruses! Now how will our caveman ancestors get around?"
Not on the hardworking backs of Joe the Plumber -- MRMacrum, told you I'd rectify my thoughtless offense; see below! -- since we'll all be dead, I can tell you that! First Saddam hits us on 9/11, then his arch-ally, the Invisible Caliphate of Osama, gives us the Manchurian Messiah to tear us apart from within, and now they want to take our video games away!
Good job with the free pub, Sony. And if anyone was/is/would be offended, go jump -- and I think I'm turning into Pat Buchanan as I type this -- in a lake and swim over to Bill Donohue's house. Religions that share manufactured rage together stay together. Except when they're killing each other with suicide bombers and illegal invasions and occupations, but why be nitpicky.
Hold on to your panties, ladies and gents, it's The Official World Series Prediction® of this blog!
Tampa Bay vs. Philadelphia: fuck if I know. The Rays have a deeper starting rotation, Hamels is the best of either staff, both squads have solid bullpens, intangible A, intangible 32, vitamin B12. I'm banking on Ryan Howard not sucking vast amounts of posterior for a third consecutive series. Plus there's that whole 'I personally know a Phillies Phanatic and I fear for my ears' thing. Phillies in 7.
Now stimulate me, baby!
Um, no, not you, Ben. Her.
"Oh, sweetest Randal, it's so cold and overcast outside. Let's stay in where it's warm and cozy. You can read me poetry and then we'll make it hot like an overheating computer processing too many requests in between lazy complainers bitching --"
Sometimes I hate being at work.